Tiny clothes invoke terror in grown man

How about that for a headline?

There was a sale… you know women and sales. So now we have clothes for a newborn in our house. This has never happened before. We knew Sprog was not coming home before we got to the purchasing stage. I am having a hard time getting my head around the fact that in a few months I will be responsible for the wellbeing of a small human who will fit into those clothes. I have seen dolls who are too big for them. Who are they trying to kid? No human is ever that size, surely. They are funny looking, these little jumpsuit things. Short little legs and long, long bodies. I have forgotten what a baby looks like. But I have still not forgotten what it feels like to hold mine.

I got my 60 day keytag last week. The tiny clothes are scarier than the prospect of a lifetime of sobriety. The tiny clothes mean a lifetime of parenting. I kind of need to be better at that than I am at sobriety.


14 Responses to “Tiny clothes invoke terror in grown man”

  1. Teagan Says:

    Congrats on your keytag, it is an impressive achievement. i was terrified to of shopping for my daughter Livy’s clothing, tiny things seem like they’re easier to break. i’m sure you’ll be a good dad, you love Sprog and you seem to be getting better at loving yourself, 60 day keytag :), you’ll be alright, just keep working at it. you’re in my thoughts.

  2. Hey, 2 accomplishments — 60 day keytag and tiny clothes! Congrats!!! Keep at it working towards the next keytag and purchasing more tiny clothes. For me the teeny tiny socks always got me. Little socks in the laundry was enough to make me a blubbering fool. In the best sense possible. 😀

  3. congrats on the tiny clothes and the keytag..awesome on both counts.

  4. What’s most amazing is when you see these tiny clothes, then you put them on and your baby swims in them…now my son cannot fold himself up completely in my lap and I’m just amazed by it all.

    The key to good parenting and the key to sobriety are really the same – care, focus, and get up when you fall down.


  5. Congrats indeed on the keytag.

    You’ll be an amazing Dad. I know.

  6. reunionwritings Says:

    Work your program that will make you feel less afraid. Stick with the winners, you know the blah blah.
    90 meetings in 90 days, work the steps.

    It’s not a lifetime, just one day at a time, same for the baby.

    It’s a wonderful gift you are being given, I am so happy for you. You have the gift of clean time and this too.

    You deserve to be happy.

    I am always here if you want to talk to another addict.

  7. Well done for 60 days. It musn’t have been easy for you. I hope each day brings you more and more strength and infinite smiles.

    I have no doubt you’ll be a SuperDad!

  8. I laughed when I came across your site. Someone Googled and came to my site which is entitled Diary of a Madman, and they found mine because apparently I was blogging about pooping disorders. Keep up the good blogging.

  9. So.. uh.. are the clothes… pink??

  10. momseekingpeace Says:

    Hey Brad

    Good Job on the 60 days.

    I must share with you, when I lost my first son, I drank alot right after for a couple years, then I got sober, I have two more boys, they have never seen me drink, I reunited, he has never seen me drink either, yesterday was 22 years. I have been sober longer than I was alive when I went into treatment. I did it the only way I could, one day at a time. I am so grateful that I am sober and that my kids don’t know what it looks like to see me drunk.

    I went to an NA meeting tonight with a mom that is getting her life together, she has one year.

    I am behind you all the way, this baby doesnt ever have to see you anyway but clean and sober, that is such an amazing thought.

    Keep coming back, it works.

  11. momseekingpeace Says:

    I told my story as encouragement, I hope it was taken that way.

    I’m just really happy for you that you got your 60 day key chain.

  12. Is all well?

  13. maryreunited Says:

    Brad I am so excited for you, you are going to make a wonderful father, I know it in my heart. I have read you for months now and I truly think if you can handle all you have, being a dad will be a piece of cake.. I am back by the by and writing again..


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